Find parking spot. Pull in. Stop the car. Unbuckle the seat belt. Gather belongings. Open the door. Left foot first. Then… SPLASH!!! You’re in the parking lot ocean. Do you know how to swim? I do. I watch for cars pulling in and backing out of spaces whose drivers might or might not see me.… Continue reading Parking Lot Oceans Swallow Me Up
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Peeing with Strangers
Ah, drunkenness. Making you do things you would never do in real life. It’s an alternate universe where everything you do makes sense. On a recent karaoke night, when drunkenness is mandatory, I was waiting in line to tinkle. When it was my turn, a very drunk woman said “Can I come pee with you?… Continue reading Peeing with Strangers
3 Tips to Live Through Corporate Purgatory or Join a Commune
Disclaimer: I neither take part in nor condone the following statements. 1. Dick around as much as possible. Whether it is chatting with coworkers, playing pranks on coworkers, or watching netflix on your iphone while on the toliet, dick around as much as possible. After catching up with the rumor mill and successfully hiding your… Continue reading 3 Tips to Live Through Corporate Purgatory or Join a Commune
Playing Hard to Get with Seattle Metro
He plays hard to get. I can’t count on him. He is rude to me. He steals my money. He can be a bit rough. No, I am not talking about my boyfriend (who is as cuddly as a teddy bear and cute as a button), I am talking about the Seattle Metro of course!… Continue reading Playing Hard to Get with Seattle Metro